Why is It so Hard to Find a Child Therapist?

You’ve contacted a bunch of places and no one is returning your calls. The ones that you do talk to say they have a waiting list or aren’t working with young children. You are not even sure if they are good at what they do or will understand what your child needs. You know you need an appointment with someone!

But it shouldn’t be the case that your child meets with just anyone. In fact, finding the right child therapist could be the difference your child needs so they are no longer stuck, angry, sad, depressed, or anxious. A good child therapist will help your child learn how to solve problems, strengthen relationships, and feel optimistic about new experiences.  If you are wondering where those types of therapists are, it is a matter of finding a practice that really understands how children think and what makes them successful.

There are a number of reasons this could be a challenge and how you can overcome the obstacle of finding a child therapist in New York.

Many therapists do not work with young children.

It is much more common to work with older adolescents, adults, and couples than children. This is because they can more easily communicate the difficulties they are experiencing and discuss solutions. Children need more of a “back door” or indirect approach, including learning to identify their emotions and how to respond differently to frustration.

It takes a lot of compassion, patience, and experience to help children navigate these circumstances. Not every therapist loves working with children or is destined to do so, nor should they. However, this can make it that much harder to find a child therapist that can help your child.

Those who work with children might not be trained or specialize in approaches that fit your child’s needs.

Many therapy training programs focus on a general approach to therapy. While this can be useful, this approach does not take into account strategies that children need to be successful. When interviewing a child therapist, it is important to ask questions about their level of advanced training in areas such as play therapy, sand tray therapy, child-centered play therapy, trauma therapy for children, pediatric biofeedback therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, and EMDR among other modalities.

It can also be helpful to ask about their experience with children struggling with specific issues such as anxiety, depression, and trauma. If you find that they cannot address your child’s needs it is best to keep looking until you find a therapist that can assist your child.

Insurance disincentivizes child therapists from using certain modalities.

Many insurance companies cap the number of sessions therapists can meet with your child or will not reimburse for the time needed to implement more sophisticated treatment methods, such as EMDR. In addition, insurance companies require a diagnosis for treatment which may not accurately reflect your child’s situation over time.

Furthermore, the diagnosis often remains in your child’s permanent record which even though no longer relevant, can impact them when they reach adulthood, such as when looking for a job. In our experience, it is best to avoid working with a child therapist that accepts insurance to avoid these pitfalls and allow the therapist to help your child in the best way possible.

However, if you do need to use insurance, many insurance plans will reimburse for those with out of network benefits. Using your out of network benefits may be a good compromise as they tend to have less restrictions on the work your child’s therapist provides.

There are scheduling limitations when working with children.

Most children are not available during the day due to school obligations and afterschool activities. This often means child therapists will need to work around your child’s schedule and meet for appointments in the afternoons and evenings. As only so many children can be seen at a time, it may be difficult to find a therapist that has room in their schedule.

Some child therapists may limit sessions only to certain days as well. If you are looking for an appointment as soon as possible it can be helpful to have flexibility in your schedule, including making your child available during weekends or having them see a therapist virtually if they are not in the office.

Large child therapy practices experience frequent turnover and burnout.

Often in large practices, usually those that take insurance, therapists may have large caseloads which prevent them from providing personalized care to the children and families they see.  While your child is “seen,” this does not necessarily mean they are receiving the treatment they need. Usually, large child therapy practices will employ newer, less experienced clinicians who do not necessarily have advanced skills, training, or experience.

This could affect the quality of therapy your child receives and may make it take longer for them to show progress. In addition, due to burnout from therapists having larger caseloads your child’s therapist may eventually leave the practice in search of better opportunities. This can be upsetting to children who form close connections with their therapists and rely on their support.

In smaller, private child therapy practices, your child may receive more individualized and specialized services. These practices will also take the time to train therapists and provide lower caseloads. As a result, your child will get the attention and support they deserve provided by happy therapists with a desire to cultivate positive relationships with you and your child.

It takes time for child therapists to connect with a network of referring providers.

While there are a lot of well-meaning child therapists out there, they may not be connected to a system of referral sources that can help you connect with them. Schools, pediatricians and family attorneys are common sources of referrals. However, they are often extremely busy and do not always have time to network with child therapists. As a result, they are not always aware of child clinicians that can support in times of need.

Your child’s therapist could be out there but often connections are made; it could be difficult to find them. It takes persistence and time for good child therapists to establish relationships with referring providers. Parents will often provide feedback about those child therapists they found helpful and those to avoid. This can be helpful for providers so they can refer to those that can best help children they serve.

Many child therapists have virtual practices and are not seeing clients in person.

Particularly in recent years, many child therapists are seeing clients virtually or through telehealth. Online child therapy is a newer phenomenon that is making access to child therapy even easier than ever. There are a lot of benefits to seeing a child therapist virtually, including more flexibility in scheduling, eliminating travel and wait times, reducing stigma and intimidation factors when entering an office, and allowing therapy to occur in the child’s natural environment where they are most comfortable. Many parents have embraced online therapy as a welcome solution to support their children.

Some children however are not as responsive or able to participate in online therapy. Extremely young children, those with severe anxiety or children with autism may not respond well to online therapy approaches. In addition, some parents feel strongly that their child needs an in-person approach. Families may have a more difficult time finding child therapists that offer in-person services.

This may change as the pandemic’s impact lessons and more therapists return to the office. Sometimes a child can start therapy online and pivot to in-person if needed. Again, being flexible as well as finding an approach that works for your child can be useful in this situation.

Child issues often happen during stressful times, leading to an influx of parent requests and overwhelming demand.

Perhaps your child is stressed about returning to school after a relaxing summer or you notice a decline in their grades. Many times, issues related to school can happen at times when other children are struggling as well. As a result, child therapy practices may be inundated by requests for appointments.

Your child’s difficulties may have started long before it was obvious something was wrong. Pay attention to subtle cues that your child is struggling, such as bouts of sadness, anger outbursts, or frequently attempting to avoid certain situations. These warning signs can indicate a large problem is brewing. The good news is that by getting support early on your child will likely be more receptive and bounce back in a shorter amount of time.

Parents are busy and may not always have the time to research or make a ton of phone calls to find a child therapist.

When you notice your child is struggling emotionally or they engage in a dangerous behavior, you need to support your child right away. However, for all the reasons mentioned above, it takes time to find a good child therapist. And it can be very discouraging to call therapists that can’t or won’t help. As a result, you may put off getting the support your child needs. Of course, this could exacerbate the problem making you feel even more desperate.

As mentioned, it is best to be able to take your time to find a child therapist that can truly help your child. Therefore, by making it a priority to write down questions and provide a complete picture of your child’s struggles you can make this process easier. Furthermore, you can take action when your child is starting to show signs that they need a child therapist so you will not be rushed to find someone.

The best child therapists have waiting lists and may not be available when you need them.

You are more aware of what to look for and when you cannot get an appointment with the perfect child therapist it can be discouraging. Do not despair. If you need to go on a waiting list with a great therapist as appointments do become available. If you have luxury to wait, it is best to have your child seen by a therapist that can truly help them thrive.

Courageous Kids Counseling is a specialized therapy practice in Nyack, New York providing quality services to children and teens both virtually and in person. We understand the frustration in not being able to find a good child therapist and strive to provide the best child therapy without the wait. Our therapists understand kids and how to help them overcome obstacles. We support children of all ages struggling with anxiety, depression, and trauma, and work with families as well.

Our mission is to provide a direct therapy approach from the first appointment focused on teaching children strategies that they can use in real-life situations. We also believe strongly in building relationships with children and parents and providing support both in and out of session. If you’re ready to get started give us a call or schedule an appointment today.